Wednesday, December 21, 2011

The Elf on the Shelf Debacle

When I was growing up the only thing we had keeping us from being on the Naughty List around this time of year was one of those see into my soul glares from any adult figure saying "If you don't stop what you are doing right now, I will make your behind so sore you won't be able to sit down until after Christmas!"

But these days a marketing genius has come up with "The Elf on the Shelf"

The Elf on the Shelf is Santa's helper to keep an eye on your children to make sure they are behaving like they SHOULD BE!!! 

Where am I when all of these billion dollar schemes are well....SCHEMED UP???

Hailey has had an Elf on the Shelf at her house since last year.  His name is Mr. Gingerbread Man and props to her mama for some very cute and imaginative ideas.  Yesterday I had a text message where Mr. Gingerbread man had rolled the Christmas tree :) Too Cute!!!

Hailey spends every other weekend, every Wednesday night, and any other day she feels like visiting at our house.

But since Thanksgiving her biggest worries have been what she will get from Santa (Her list is GINORMOUS) whether Santa will know where to find her, and what her Elf on the Shelf will do while she is at our house.

At the beginning of the Christmas decorating season (Which for us was the weekend before Thanksgiving) I purchased a stuffed green elf to sit with a snowman...this was of course Hailey's idea ;) make a long story short, the first night that she stayed with us after Mr. Gingerbread Man came to her house, our elf came to life too ;) In other words, Mr. Gingerbread Man shared his magic with our Elf now known as Bama (Smart Girl).

So like clockwork every time Hailey spends the night Bama moves to a new place with a new note, or new joke and she loves it!!! It is a wonderful tool to try and keep your children in line around the holidays!!!

Here is where the trouble started...It was a Monday morning after Hailey had spent the weekend with us.  I usually get up around 2 AM to go to the bathroom and that is when I move her elf.  Well.........OF COURSE on this Monday I didn't!!!! So at 5 AM when the alarm went off I went sneaking in there to move Bama.  At this point Bama was hanging upside down off of a shelf in the living room, and for those of you that don't know; Hailey doesn't have her own room at our house just yet because we live in a 3 bedroom trailer and the boys occupy both rooms! (Bring on the house building) Well back to the story, since Hailey doesn't have her own room she sleeps on an air mattress in the living room when she stays over.  Well since Bama is hanging upside down from a shelf that is over the love seat, I am having to tip toe around Hailey and the air mattress, lean over the love seat, and gently pry Bama down.....this is where things got was like an alarm went off in Hailey's head telling her something was messing with Bama.....that is the key to the Elf on the Shelf idea....YOU CANNOT TOUCH THE ELF!!!! IT MESSES WITH THE MAGIC!!!! As soon as I made contact with Bama's arm Hailey's eyes pop open and she is staring right at ME!!!!! My heart stops!!!!

Oh no what do I do???

Immediately her eyes close and she rolls over.

Did she see me???

Does she know???

Did I ruin Christmas???

How do I explain why I am moving Bama???

Lord please help me!!!

I leave Bama hanging and go back to the bedroom where Philly is SNORING up a storm.

"Philly, Philly, Philly"....nudge nudge nudge...."PHILLY!!!!!!" 


I think Hailey saw me moving the elf! What do we do?"

"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" I am in the middle of what I think is the biggest Christmas Catastrophy since "Christmas Vacation"

And I can't even get a little support????? This is where I want to SCREAM at the top of my lungs for Philly to get up and help me figure out the severity of this situation.  But, in doing so, one of two things is going to happen. 1.) I am going to wake Hailey up if she has gone back to sleep and 2.) I am going to wake Hailey up if she has gone back to sleep!!!!!

So I go tip toeing back in the living room.....I slowly reach up to move Bama again and low and behold the child rolls over and scares the BAJEEZUS out of me again!!!!!

This is where I immediately hit freak out mode and have no idea WHAT TO DO!!!!! 

I mean we are right back to the moment where.......

Oh no what do I do??? 

Did she see me???

Does she know???

Did I ruin Christmas???

How do I explain why I am moving Bama???

Lord please help me!!! 

I then decide that if she asks me about it I am going to play it off and tell her if she "THINKS SHE SAW ME MOVING BAMA" she was definitely dreaming because Bama is magical and he moves by himself.  This is it....this is where I go for it...this is where I decide to go all in and MOVE THE ELF....But you are never going to believe what HAPPENS HERE!!!!! 


That's right absolutely nothing!!! She was asleep the whole time, even when she scared me to death and opened her eyes and looked at me.  She never said anything about it, and when she woke up I had hidden Bama so well and in such a cute spot she walked right past him!!!  Thank you Santa for allowing me to move Bama without being detected!!! But maybe next time....A LITTLE HELP???? 

 I mean geez big guy....we lie for you all year long, we buy the presents you are supposedly "making in your workshop", you get all the credit, and then the children get mad at us when they find out you aren't as AWESOME as they originally thought you were, and in the middle of all of this YOU CAN'T MOVE A LITTLE ELF??? 

I mean can make reindeer fly?????

Happy Holidays to Everyone!!!! May you have better luck moving your "Elf on the Shelf!"

Merry Christmas!!! 

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