Monday, December 3, 2012
How does it make "her" feel???
(Image from www.globalgoodgroup.com)
With today's divorce rate being higher than ever before, blended marriages are a common sight nowadays. To clarify, a blended marriage is when both partners are bringing children into the marriage from a previous marriage. Having said that, in my opinion a marriage like mine is also a blended marriage, because even though I don't have any children of my own, Phil and I have to blend to make our marriage work. We have to blend on a daily basis. For example, we blend when we deal with scheduling conflicts with ex-wives, and we blend when we have to work out holidays, and we blend when we work out birthday parties.
All relationships have to "blend" in some way or another, but the definition of a blended family is focusing solely on the fact that you are blending members of one family into another family. The reason I am bringing up this "blending" is because I happened upon an article today that got the hamster wheels in my brain spinning.
(Image from www.divorcesourceradio.com)
Here is the link to the article, but I will sum it up for you to save time. Basically, Brandi Glanville, Eddie Cibrian's ex (LeAnne Rimes' Husband) lashed out at LeAnne via Twitter this weekend. The lashing was because LeAnne tweeted this "Flying out with my boys in a few hrs. Love that it's a family tour weekend. It's always more fun when they are with me."
This was Glanville's response to LeAnne's tweet, "Someone is trying 2 get under my skin by calling MY children "her boys" Sooo transparent! They R MY boys, Eddie Boys and ur step-sons... 4 now."
(Image from www.huffingtonpost.com)
So as you can see Glanville was upset because LeAnne called her biological sons, "her" sons.
What am I trying to get at here??? Well, I call my step-babies, my kids all the time. I talk about "my kids" on Facebook, Twitter, and in regular verbal conversation. If you are reading this, you know that I talk about them on a blog that is basically about well....MY KIDS.....so.....I would like to know if you think it is acceptable for me to call them my kids, or if I should take the ex-wives feelings into considerations, and label them as my Step-Babies only...
I never once thought about the fact that an ex-wife might get angry because I called the kids mine. If it were the other way around, I would be happy that my ex-husband's new wife loved my kids enough to call them her own, but we all know that all women are wired differently, and something that doesn't get under my skin (Which is nothing, because I overreact about everything.) might get under others' skin.
On the other hand, what about my feelings? I work hard to be a good Step-Mom, I want them to know that I love them, and that I will always be there for them, and that they can come to me with anything, no matter how good, bad or indifferent it might be. I LOVE MY KIDS!!!
So who is right, and who is wrong? Can't they just be the ex-wives' kids, and my kids? We are all on the same team here, we are all trying to be the best parents we can be. Why does there have to be a side?
As always, thanks for stopping by!